tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4186970864293258312.post3591125637169162744..comments2023-10-19T08:17:37.794-07:00Comments on I Have Things...: I'm in a MoodTChttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06927536275580889825noreply@blogger.comBlogger17125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4186970864293258312.post-36180694086324608332010-04-18T16:50:26.331-07:002010-04-18T16:50:26.331-07:00"Not only do I not necessarily like where I a..."Not only do I not necessarily like where I am, but I also don't like the idea of what it would take to change that."<br /><br />Struggling with this myself. But, at the same time, I know that I'm privileged enough that it's really my responsibility to figure out how to get the life I want.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4186970864293258312.post-34086493035526640372010-04-16T23:57:19.708-07:002010-04-16T23:57:19.708-07:00Here I am a retiree... never had children, didn&#...Here I am a retiree... never had children, didn't get married until I was 55 and had a job that I actually loved for 39 years. Never ever thought I could be retired... Husband dies, employer dies and the other job that I had part time collapsed when the building was sold.<br />Could no longer afford NY so here I am in FL... not terribly happy about it, can't find a job because I don&#ABhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17034035980682370632noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4186970864293258312.post-6080385867657437202010-04-15T15:22:10.962-07:002010-04-15T15:22:10.962-07:00Oh the "supposeds! I'm supposed to be mo...Oh the "supposeds! I'm supposed to be more successful, more ambitious, better paid, and, yes, HAPPIER. What if in reality I'm supposed to be antsy, craving change, in a permanent state of transition? In that case, I'm right where I'm supposed to be, I guess. Thanks for the great discussion.Leightongirlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01995668005241526484noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4186970864293258312.post-24558682687328050802010-04-15T13:55:54.099-07:002010-04-15T13:55:54.099-07:00My situation is slightly different than what you g...My situation is slightly different than what you guys are describing. <br /><br />What I've realized thru a writing/self class I've been taking is that I'm actually fairly satisfied with how things are going, but I feel like I'm supposed to want things to be different. Like I'm supposed to miss working, or I'm supposed to want to love all the home-related stuff (like Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4186970864293258312.post-10184375999007966792010-04-15T13:07:55.372-07:002010-04-15T13:07:55.372-07:00I had to chuckle as I read Emily's description...I had to chuckle as I read Emily's description of herself & her husband; that could me & mine to the letter! He gets so antsy when I even start to just "fantasize out loud" about "what-ifs."Niksmomhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14715465327343655483noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4186970864293258312.post-13893128380076045862010-04-15T12:49:18.198-07:002010-04-15T12:49:18.198-07:00(The advantage of knowing many of your readers per...(The advantage of knowing many of your readers personally is that you can call them on their stuff...)<br /><br />But, Hilary! Weren't you just PRESIDENT of your professional organization? I know that on a day-to-day the attitude of a boss can really work on you, but I don't think that saying you haven't been successful--or that you aren't thought of as someone relevant and TChttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09490117693253485044noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4186970864293258312.post-91833814318391475352010-04-15T12:42:39.490-07:002010-04-15T12:42:39.490-07:00Thanks for the tweet to check this out TC. I'm...Thanks for the tweet to check this out TC. I'm there with you - and the commentors. I agree with everything that's been written here. <br /><br />I talk about my cushy government job and in many ways it really is - I have lots of flexibility both in terms of time spent at work & what I choose to work on, but I still wish I was doing something else. What else is anybody's guess. <Hilaryhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06343876323916492997noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4186970864293258312.post-63634440591157272892010-04-15T12:07:55.205-07:002010-04-15T12:07:55.205-07:00I'm in kind of the same boat - have a boring u...I'm in kind of the same boat - have a boring unsatisfying job where I don't get a lot of respect, but I want to work/like the stability that goes along with having a good salary and insurance and all that stuff. I have other things I'd like to do but nothing so compelling that I'm willing to really go for it. <br /><br />I mostly just vent to my boss about how much my job sucks Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4186970864293258312.post-84230711135466513152010-04-15T12:02:07.331-07:002010-04-15T12:02:07.331-07:00Oooh. I get it. That's just how Viking would f...Oooh. I get it. That's just how Viking would feel...and does when I start talking about big changes. All of our big changes have me behind them. Maybe you need me to come live there for a week, bug the crap out of you, arguing that to move forward, we've GOT to do something different...and you'll be so desperate to get me to shut up, you'll make a move.<br /><br />More seriously, EJ Willinghamhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07333507287598525182noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4186970864293258312.post-39419850968420395182010-04-15T11:54:06.400-07:002010-04-15T11:54:06.400-07:00I'm actually the stability-seeker, Emily; I ha...I'm actually the stability-seeker, Emily; I hatehatehatehate change. I hate unpredictability. I am not only a brat, but a very boring brat.<br /><br />I think that's a key part of my dissatisfaction with my current situation: Not only do I not necessarily like where I am, but I also don't like the idea of what it would take to change that. As it is, a good part of my issue with it allTChttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09490117693253485044noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4186970864293258312.post-63477019799613282592010-04-15T11:46:40.447-07:002010-04-15T11:46:40.447-07:00TC, it's funny you say "brat" becaus...TC, it's funny you say "brat" because I often think of myself as one. I'm an embodiment in some ways of a "first-world problems."<br /><br />I think that what keeps me happiest is change. And that's why, if things aren't changing, I'm not happy. That's all there is to it. <br /><br />My husband is the exact opposite. He's happiest with stability. EJ Willinghamhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07333507287598525182noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4186970864293258312.post-59490819325553596722010-04-15T10:54:51.315-07:002010-04-15T10:54:51.315-07:00I think we all suffer from '70s Girl Power Syn...I think we all suffer from '70s Girl Power Syndrome: we were smart girls who were told (and this was revolutionary) that we could be whatever we wanted to be. Well naturally, we wanted to be happy, and fulfilled, and dang, that didn't quite work out the way we had hoped. Because however your time is split between working for cash money and caring for your kids, you're not always goingpohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01955447129419154979noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4186970864293258312.post-63959314838834203872010-04-15T06:00:57.690-07:002010-04-15T06:00:57.690-07:00To carry over the lyrical theme, I think this is w...To carry over the lyrical theme, I think this is why the Stones song: "You Can't Always Get What You Want" speaks to me on every level: motherhood, career, marriage, life...<br /><br />I often wonder if we are just pre-wired to be restless, unsatisfied, unable to settle in and enjoy the lives we have. I don't know the answer, just that you aren't a brat and that most women Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4186970864293258312.post-4234705380835355592010-04-15T05:29:01.053-07:002010-04-15T05:29:01.053-07:00You have many comrades in brattiness. Although no...You have many comrades in brattiness. Although not a writer, reality bites is real to me and common for many working moms. Part of it is being pulled in too many directions between work and home and not having enough time to decompress between the two. I feel like my to-do list is constant and ever-growing and I don't have the added concerns of special ed and IEPs for my kids.<br /><br />Megnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4186970864293258312.post-12065670914183650112010-04-14T22:24:35.064-07:002010-04-14T22:24:35.064-07:00Oh, bingo, Emily. Niksmom is right; you got it in ...Oh, bingo, Emily. Niksmom is right; you got it in the last paragraph. That's exactly what I was feeling, and why I wrote this.<br /><br />It's funny. I went to a reading tonight (I'll try to write about that tomorrow), and on the way home I was thinking that what I'd written today was just self-indulgent and made me look like a brat and I should just delete it, and then I saw the TChttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09490117693253485044noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4186970864293258312.post-12260359342426864312010-04-14T18:14:29.646-07:002010-04-14T18:14:29.646-07:00Oh, Emily hit the nub of it in her last paragraph....Oh, Emily hit the nub of it in her last paragraph. At least, for me. While Nik was in school I hated not having him home. Now he's home (older and so much more, um, "active") I realize i can't homeschool and have a life and take care of myself, try to get back into the workforce or write... and...and...and... I feel like I'm damned if I do, damned if I don't. Yep, Niksmomhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14715465327343655483noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4186970864293258312.post-42117906267246239702010-04-14T18:04:39.961-07:002010-04-14T18:04:39.961-07:00We are similar. I'm embarrassed about how diff...We are similar. I'm embarrassed about how difficult it is to satisfy me, especially jobwise. There is without question no 5-days-a-week office full-time (or even part-time) office job that's gonna leave me feeling anything but dread every single morning. I hate that feeling you express of being stuck...of not going anywhere any time soon. I, too, am very difficult to please, being EJ Willinghamhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07333507287598525182noreply@blogger.com