Why does depression always hit right when everything in my life is upside down and I can't really focus on myself? Oh...wait... 9:22 AM Feb 4th from webIt was a bit of a throwaway...Those of you on Twitter know what I mean. It was just what was on my mind at that moment; within thirty seconds, though, I was thinking about something else. I mean, sure, I've been struggling a little lately, but...you know. You KNOW. I know you do.
What I'd forgotten, however, is that Baroy is on Twitter. Rarely, but he's there. And he just so happened to check his feed that day, and I guess my comment worried him. When I got home that night, he pulled me aside, looked deeply into my eyes, and asked me if everything was OK.
I, of course, had no idea what he was talking about.
"Yeah. Why are you looking at me like that?"
"Oh," he said, taken aback. "It's just...I read on Twitter...and..."
"Ah," I said, understanding, waving my hand dismissively, embarrassed. "Well, yeah, you know how it's been. Just a hard time right now. I was just feeling sorry for myself. But I'm fine. I'll be fine."
Except, of course, that for my (you know what men are like, right?) need-to-fix-it husband, "I'll be fine" wasn't good enough. And so he's spent the last couple of days trying to make me feel better.
His first couple of attempts were totally male, and that's all I'll say about that. But then I came home today, after a morning out with the kids, to a newly mopped kitchen floor, a scrubbed stovetop, and a oven that...Wait. You have to see it to believe it.
To make it even more impressive? That is an OOOOOOLLLLLLDDDDDD oven. At least 35 years old. Maybe more. So to get it that clean? Took some serious dedication.I sometimes forget, in the midst of being annoyed at him about this or that or the other little thing, what a good guy he is. What a good person he is. In many ways, a better person than I am. Because I can say without hesitation that, were the tables turned, I'd be all eyerollingly annoyed that he was falling apart on me at a difficult time. I would not, on a free-to-do-what-I-want-by-myself Saturday morning, be scrubbing years-old sweet potato leavings from the bottom of an ancient oven to try to make him feel better.
That my friends, is love. I'm so lucky. I just need to remember that.
9 comments:
Dear Baroy,
I'm depressed too. Come on over, I'll provide the cleaning supplies.
Love,
Green
Dear TC,
What do you mean, "Get your own husband!"?
Love,
Green
I'm so happy for you that you have someone who cares, both to ask and to try to fix it in ways that are actually helpful (not that a clean kitchen fixes depression but it sure does go in the right direction.
That's just awesome. So glad you have each other!
You're right, they always need to "fix" things. This is much better and any fix!
Wow. J knows I'm depressed, and yet the floors remain filthy, and the oven? Not that bad to begin with (because I seldom bake anything involved).
That Baroy - he's a good guy.
xo
I love that he did just the right thing. I just love it. :)
I love that Baroy so thoughtfully did something which many, many men would never even *think* about...even if you asked them to!
I also love that you appreciate it and recognize it for what it is.
I think our spouses must somehow be related. Nice to know there's more than one really swell guy out there. :-)
That is so sweet. I am sorry you were/are having a difficult time.
My dad would wash the floors and windows for my mom because he said that was not women's work. AH! He definitely was not an old fashioned husband.
I line my oven with aluminum foil and I am going to get one of those drip thingies for the bottom. I imagine this oven is about the age of yours and the people did not take care of it. What did he use to clean it?
I love you
Dang I have been feeling depressed the last 2 days, think he wants to come do some things at my house??
My husband RARELY cleans! I have just found your blog, please check my two out.
Wow! I mean seriously. I thought my husband was good, but even he wouldn't think of that. Very impressive.
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