An Open Letter To N's Third-Grade Teacher

Really? You have absolutely nothing positive to say about my child in the comments section of his report card? REALLY? Not a thing?

N continues to work below grade level.

Well, duh, lady. I'm pretty sure the IEP, at which point they pulled him out of your classroom for most of his major academics, would have been the first clue. The second was the fact that, because of that, you weren't even allowed GIVE HIM GRADES in those subjects. So, um, yeah. We know. Thanks for noting it.

He has difficulty reading or speaking in class.

We know this one, too. I get it. You're documenting. Carry on.

He has not developed any strong friendships and prefers to work alone.

It's called autism. But, you know, whatever. Salt in the wound, I can handle it. Again, you want to make sure these things are in his record. OK. Maybe his next year's teacher will refuse to read the IEP like you did, so it will help that he or she is forewarned by these notes.

That's not what made me shaking angry. What made me shaking angry was the fact that the comments stopped right there.

You were diligent about documenting his issues, for sure. But you had this child in your classroom for 10 months, and you have nothing positive to say about him? I can think of a few things you could have said. More than a few actually. I assume it would have cost you years off your life to say that it was a pleasure to have him in your class, or that you hope he has a good summer. But you could have noted that, despite your often-obvious hostility toward him, he never once spoke disrespectfully to you. You could have said that, despite his difficulties connecting with his peers, he never hits or pushes or bites or even really butts heads with anyone in any way, including verbally. You could even have said that he withstood some pretty nasty taunting--most of which went on right under your nose--with considerable grace and aplomb. And you could have pointed out how he did pretty much everything that was asked of him that fell outside of his known disabilities--and some that fell within as well, including getting up on a stage to perform with his class last week.

But you didn't. Because you are a bitch. (Apparently I'm the one who deserves the "needs improvement" in "gets along with others" which you gave him.)

And so Baroy and I will clean up yet another of the completely unnecessary messes you left for us this year, and we will just not show N his report card. We won't even mention it. If he asks, we'll show him the notes from his resource-room teacher, who wrote things like "has been trying hard" and "has good ideas" throughout the progress report she put together regarding his IEP's goals and benchmarks.

Because, you know, she's a human being. Who actually likes children. Even if they have the absolute gall to have special needs ... and thus need special care.

Fourth grade will be better, right? Because I am absolutely done with third.